A Letter to Mum

Dearest Mum,

Did you know you are the only mother who will die to save me? Of course you know that and I will do the same for you too. You are the most wonderful woman in my life. Surely! Any woman that is going to come into my life has a lot of compete with. Mum I can’t talk about you in any place, on any platform without talking about you carrying me in your womb for nine months. 9 solid months going around carrying a huge head like me. That will be stressful and tiring. I’m sure in those times at least, at least mum, if it was possible to give me to dad to carry you would have done it. Or wouldn’t you? lol Honestly mum I don’t think I can carry someone with a huge head like mine in my stomach for 9 months! 1 day will be a nightmare, not to talk of 9 months! No mum, seriously,  9 months! Someone in your stomach slashing down what you eat by 50% if not more, then makes you look huge and out of shape and to top it all have a person use your womb for football and boxing practice. Wow! I want to tell you I’m glad you carried me in your womb because if you gave me to dad I don’ think he could take the heat. LOL.

I really wanted to write to you today because I was touched during your graduation. A few days ago you graduated BA in Entrepreneurship with a 2^nd class upper. I was so touched! Why? There are many reasons, mum. First, you also told us that when you stopped high school (sixth form) because of so many reasons you didn’t even dream you would go to the university but today look you are graduating from one. Second, you kept your responsibilities as a mother and a wife during the school period. It is tough, I know. Even for me who does not have half of the responsibilities you have it is tough. I can’t begin to imagine how you coped. You made sure the house was in order always before you left for school. There were even times when you had to study for tests and exams, many times you felt tired after doing the house work and were unable to study but you made it. Third, you went to the university for the first degree at age 47 if my calculations are right. At that age, mum, to cram information, study and come out with a 2^nd class upper, you deserve some credit. Because being a mother and going to school at 30 is even difficult, even at 27 with one child, how much more at 47 with three children, a nephew, a husband and an entire household? Difficult is an understatement. Even that only I have left out the details because learning and being there for your children and bringing them up the right way is hard work and mum you worked hard. When I attended your graduation you were 50 years.

Mum you have really inspired me and many others out there and although I know you won’t stop there, you have done a lot. Mum, many students at my age with less than half the responsibilities you have come short of a second class altogether, to even talk of an upper is a dream. To them a 1^st class would be a miracle, simply unattainable! For me it is a challenge, because if my old mother came out with a second class upper, I should…in fact I must come out with nothing short of a first class.

One more thing, can you believe how many males out there can actually cook? Very, very, very few! Mum you taught me how to and I appreciate it so much. I’m able to prepare my own delicacies making me the envy of my male companions everywhere. You also thought me how to pray since my childhood days. When you woke up at dawn, you woke me up too, to pray. Sometimes I disliked the fact that you cut short my sleep but now I know the importance of someone who prays. Mum you brought me closer to God. Your devotion alone to God is enough to spark a fire within me to get close to Him. For me personally I really want to say a big THANK YOU to you and dad; being your firstborn and only son you trained me right from birth to be the man I am now and now I think it is my responsibility to guide those after me to the path you put me on. Thank You.

Mum you are truly an inspiration. Every time I think about it, I’m moved to do great things. I won’t let you down mum. I love you so much.

Your only son, scholar, prophet and professor,

Edwin.

If we are to be really great people, we must strive in good faith to play a great part in the world. We cannot avoid meeting great issues. All that we can determine for ourselves is whether we shall meet them well or ill.

Theodore Roosevelt

P.S. Dad don’t worry if you think I’m discriminating lol this is mum’s letter. You have done so much but this one goes to mum.

 

21 Years of Marriage and still going…

happy 21st anniversary

My parents celebrated their wedding anniversary a few days ago on the 1^st of Oct. they have been married now for 21 years and mum and dad I say a Happy Anniversary, the whole world wished you well when got married in 1988 and by God’s grace today you have raised a standard, a legacy of love and commitment for your children to follow and so we will.

 

You the funny thing I like about my parents wedding anniversary is that by calculating from the 1^st of October to the 1^st of July (my birthday) are exactly 9 months. I like to think of it that I was conceived on the wedding night. lol Well I was so waiting to come into this world, huh?

 

I know many people too haven’t seen the people who birthed them live together in love in one home for many years but today I tell you that it is very possible. Perhaps you didn’t get that but you can change and decide that when you find someone you love you will stay committed to them till death parts you.

 

Of course my parents aren’t the most perfect people on earth. They have had differences before, I have seen them disagree on so many issues but in order not to make the thing venture into unpleasantries one would have to let go, be it mum or dad. They both may not know it but they have thought me so much about marriage that they can imagine. My parents haven’t really talked to me or any of my siblings about love and marriage and all that but they have shown us how it is done and that is the best example anyone can receive. They have thought me that when I find the woman I love, there will be ups and downs. We can’t runaway when there are bad times and stay when there are good times, that’s not marriage, that’s CONVENIENCE!!! Marriage stays through the thick and the thin, good times and bad times.

 

Mum and Dad we look forward to celebrating your 50^th wedding Anniversary with both of you still strong and alive, with all your children, great-grandchildren, and the huge family saying ‘well done’, ‘what a leagcy’ and ‘Thank you, God!’ I pray that God Himself who started with you will end with you successfully such that when you go, you’ll be laughing and smiling and people will be crying not because you have departed but because two great repositories of love have gone. We pray strength for the many years ahead. I love you

 

Humbled by BANKU

                  I know the title sounds unbelievable but I’m not kidding banku (a Ghanaian local dish) showed me how to be humble, not that I’m a proud person. No! Far from it. I learnt something more about being humble to people younger than you. Those who know me will probably tell you that they see as a humble person but this local dish taught me some lesson I’ll never forget about humility. Stick with me I’ll show.

In the family I’m raised in, it’s made up of me, being the eldest child and son, my cousin Ben who has been with us since when was seven, my two younger sisters and of course, the parents. In my house everyone knows how to cook by age 12 and I mean COOK. Yeah! My mom made a habit of getting us to the kitchen and giving us instructions about how to prepare the food and then she’d leave. She would always tell us the story of her big brother who went abroad and called then and said, ‘he wished he had studied how to cook.” I remember cooking as young as 12-13. When I usually tell ladies that I cook, they are go like, ‘Yeah right?!” I don’t know why it is so hard to believe. Just come and live in my house for three days and I bet you momma will get you cooking things.

It has always been a bone of contention as to who’s the best cook in the house among the children. We all knew the same recipe from momma so it was really hard to tell who was. So as time went on, we’d measure it by the one who knows how to prepare different foods that the rest didn’t know how to. My cousin, Ben had always been blabbering about me being the best in academics and computers but he claimed he was the best chef in the house. Well you couldn’t fight it he was the one who knew how to prepare a particular dish I hadn’t learnt how to yet. Ben lived with our grand-ma for some time and she showed him how, my mother hadn’t taught us yet for one reason or the either. So yeah when you always went outside the house and learnt a new recipe and it was good. You classified yourself as best. Yep Banku! But before I get there I have to tell you something. As an individual I hate it when people say I can’t do something. I hated when he always said he was the best chef and I go like, “okay on what criterion?” Then he could ask, “do you know how to prepare Banku?” Then I replied loudly, “that’s the only dish you are basing it on” and he would smile and say, “well yeah but you don’t know how to either” and of course I didn’t but my pride took the challenge on.

My mom had asked someone to prepare Banku for the evening’s dinner and got up and went to try it and oh my God! I made a mess of things. But even in the mess, I thought it will all get okay. Apparently I had put too much water in the mixture and so it wasn’t getting hard. It became like porridge. I remember Ben woke up and when he saw it, he said, “it will never get hard!” but I was resistant and said it would. And he left. After ten more minutes the mixture just wasn’t getting hard enough to be called Banku so I called him, “Charle! The banku isn’t getting hard oh.” I had to finish. I was running late, my parents were bound to get back any time soon and that thing still looked like porridge. He came and told that the same thing happened when he started the first time, he had put too much water in it and grand-ma shouted at him but should how to correct it later. So I watched him put more of the raw corn dough into the mixture on fire. I just watch this younger cousin of mine teach me how to do this thing. I was so made humbled by the experience. Here I was, being a little proud about doing something  hadn’t taken time to learn and my cousin teaching me how to. I don’t know if you understand but if you know this cousin of mine, he in a way looks up to me and some of the decisions I make mainly because I’m older than him, so me now having to learn from him was new but humbling. I know it made his head swell but I didn’t care. I learnt a lifelong lesson. It doesn’t matter who the person is before you whether he’s 7 or 70 years you’ve got to be humble. Humility doesn’t mean looking down on yourself. It means there are certain things you don’t know in this life, you have flaws but you are willingly to learn from whoever teaches you whether he’s 7 or 70.

Guess what? Just two days ago, we ate Banku and guess who prepared it. yeah Me! Ben wasn’t even there to eat some. Before he came home it was all gone. Yea you might think that now Ben and I probably know how to do all the same dishes but I know he still taught me how to make this very one. In my life and in cooking somewhat, I have taught Ben certain things about certain dishes and different things but I don’t think I can ever compare it to the value I learnt from him. And Yeah…I was humbled by banku.

 

My mum’s quest about my summer

Well, yesterday i called my mum about the whole summer thingy, you know. We didn’t say anything new about the Greenhill College applications, just the same thing from two weeks ago; that they were processing it.

When i called her yesterday night, she answered, “Big Brother Africa!” Almost then i burst out into laughter as usual- i always love to laugh- Then i started thinking why she called her son, big brother, or she thought it was her brother calling , maybe. She explained immediately after,” My phone is spoiled, so i’m using Edwina’s phone-my sister-, and when the call came, the ID was big brother” Honestly i never knew i was such a big brother of a loving sister like Edwina.

Then my mum asked me when i was coming back home. I told her, “I wanted to stay till the end of the summer school” She was like,” You have to go to school, 1st September, and you want to stay and come when in August” I replied, “yea! i’m mean i’m looking at you guys, whatever you have to say, and you haven’t said anything so far, so?” She advised that come back to Ghana, within the month of July. She stressed, “By the end of the month, i want you here.” I responded giggling a bit, “Yes mum!” she said i needed to at least rest for one month before school.

I’m taking her advise, going to do just that! You know something else that made me laugh yesterday, my sister, Edwina. My mum handed the phone to her briefly, and when she took it, she said, with some forceful vioce,”when are you coming?” I said wondering what was gong through her mind,” In the first week in August” Then i heard her scream, ” Ah! What are you doing there, but the school is vacating on Friday!” I told her, ” Yea! sure, but i want to stay for the sumer classes, and help out a bit!” Edwina was not so happy, she told me, ” but I miss you soo much.” Awwww, so sweet coming from her, trust me, you hardly get those from her. I told her i missed her too, and that you know, i’ll come soon i promise. At least she agreed on the soon. How soon? I don’t even know myself.