Have Trouble Praying?

Oh Boy! For the past weeks I haven’t really prayed a lot. I have prayed but not for more than 10-20 minutes. I have made excuses upon excuses upon excuses. There were times when I really wanted to, I will set the alarm for 3 or 4am, the alarm will ring and I will be so tired to put my feet down.

 

If you really do pray and then for some time you don’t pray like you used to, you start feeling weak and empty, as if you have betrayed God. Why? Because He’s doing everything for you but you just aren’t doing your part. Ohhh of course you might go to church, pay your tithe, read your bible and all but deep down you feel there’s something lacking in your spirit. You try as much as possible to get rid of that feeling but you can’t. Then you start feeling like you haven’t prayed for so long that you are afraid to stand before God and say you’re sorry. Why? Because it isn’t the first time you have done something like that.

 

I have had that feeling. Of course things were going good physically because God cares for you even when you turn your back on Him, but deep within your soul there’s that void that can only be filled by God. Definitely, physically, you’re fine, smiling at everybody, everything seems good but you’re not happy. And that sadness could lead to depression which could eventually kill you because on the inside you just don’t feel good. Nobody told me I had to pray, I knew I needed to pray, we all do. And it is not that quickly rattled pray when you remember you haven’t prayed. No! I’m talking about that communion with your Father who made you. Most of us like to spend hours on end with our friends and family but want to quickly be done when they go to church, they want to quickly rush their prayer, they get tired when they pray for long. You spend so much time with your friends and not with God who looks after you when you don’t even regard Him. Sometimes we treat God like He’s some being who has everything He needs, and does whatever He wants and He can do without us. Why do you think someone of that nature will make you anyway since He has everything He needs? He needs us, you and I to have communion with Him, to talk to Him, to LISTEN to Him too. God is all in all, YES! But He needs man. Remember the Bible says that He’s a jealous God. As in when we put other gods before Him, He’s jealous. You think if God didn’t mind you or what you did, or needed He’d be jealous? He’s jealous of the little things we put before Him: television, video games, shopping, money, cars, houses, travelling, jobs, and education. I’m not saying those things are not good, I’m saying that when you put them before God, He gets jealous.

If you were like me and had troubling praying for one reason or the other, God needs you and I to commune with Him. (Remember what He did during Noah’s time when every human forgot about Him except Noah, he wiped them off) We can’t do well without God. Stop making excuses and go to God in prayer. Tell Him you’re sorry (it doesn’t matter if it is the 100^th time you’re saying it), and pray then listen. All that lack of the divine experience and lack of something will be filled by God. It doesn’t matter what kind of sin you committed and for how long you have been doing it. Just talk to God. Don’t rush it. Spend time talking with Him. Believe me you won’t regret it. The enemy wants to get you cold, and so ashamed that you feel God isn’t there anymore or that he won’t listen to you because of what you’ve done. He’s lying! He always has! God is still there. Bible says He never changes. He is the same yesterday, today and forever. Go to God today in prayer and pray like you mean to.

 

GOD WHISPERS

I’m sure you have definitely said these things before, ‘does God really talk to us?’ ‘something told me…’ ‘can we really hear God when he speaks?’ ‘how does God speak to us?’ ‘is it audible?’ ‘is it a small still voice?’ ‘is it very clear?’.

 

Over the generations many people have wondered whether God speaks to us audibly and how often does He speak and whether He hears us at all when we speak to me. Thing is our God speaks to us but many at times pastors and preacher men have confused us and they make us feel that it if us who don’t hear God when He speak. Some say listen to that small still voice.

 

So does God speak at all? Oh yes He does! What God does usually is to influence our thoughts, He drops ideas, thoughts into our minds. That’s why many people say something told me that this and this, that and that. God himself does speak but not so often as He influences. I prefer to call those influences whispers. Of course God speaks audibly too to people when it is major, He needs to be heard audibly.

 

Preacher men will tell you many times that God told me that this and that are going to be like this. Many times it was so much of an audible voice, it was a whispers, God pushing thoughts into their. They tell us it is God because they know where the thought is coming from so I think it is high time we stopped saying something told me… So don’t go thinking if God speaks to the preacher man why not me, well guess what He does whisper into your mind every single day

 

Oh surely the devil also pushes thoughts into your mind but just like God’s influences we make a choice, a free will to say we will go along with what came into our minds. That’s how God design it, it is your final decision to make, go with God’s whisper or the devil’s.

 

A man of God, Myles Munroe in his book “Understanding the Purpose and  Power of Prayer” wrote as that that time he had heard God audibly only three times in his entire Christian walk but most at times God influences his thoughts, God whispers into his mind.

So God whispers every day, are you listening?

 

Veracious Vida

She’s like a pearl you find in muddy waters which on first sight you might not realize and ignore as ‘dirt stone’ in the mud and forever lose the value of a wonderful experience. I always thank God I found her. The way the whole thing happened was…was…:P I’ll let you be the judge of how it started. I can’t find the right words yet.

It was a bit tricky for Vida and I when the issue of relationship came up because she wasn’t really sure I had gotten over my ex-girlfriend. Honestly I knew I really hadn’t and I didn’t really want to get myself involved immediately but I defied all odds and asked her out. I know normally people would claim it as wrong because nearly a month after my ex-girlfriend and I broke up I met Vida. Not to say I hadn’t seen her already? I mean come on she’s in all my classes…we were not that close and if you know me, you would know how easy going I am with people. We were always annoying each other bit by bit.

The climax was when one time when at home for the weekend, I had a message from Vida. Mind you I had never called her before and we never had messaged each other. I had always said I would go and see her when I met her on the campus but never really went. Then I received a message from her saying, “Edwin where are you?” I don’t know why but I got worried. Don’t blame me…:) you probably would have done the same thing. Someone you are not that close to, sends you a message on a Sunday morning asking you where you were? I got worried, I called and there was no answer for several times and that made the whole thing so serious. I got back to campus the same day and went to her place immediately since I still hadn’t had any reply but she wasn’t around. Guess what I found her smiling when I was descending her block. Immediate thought: so as least she’s feeling okay! Of course she was surprised to see me there since I hadn’t gone to her place before and she asked what I… No! I didn’t wait for her to ask, I told her I was just from her place and wanted to find out how she was doing. I escorted her back to her room, she grabbed something of hers and she said she wanted to walk around. She loves walking, amazingly something that I do so often on campus because I never had the time or maybe I hadn’t thought about it.

It’s an amazing walk; we started by annoying each other, rather funny sort of. We always do that! Before anything I asked her what happened and she sent me the message that morning. You know what I vowed never to overreact to any message again. She had just sent the message to verify if I was on campus and wanted to know if I was at the Joint Service. Ohh you should have seen my mind to know what I thought. LOL. From then we sat on what people like to call ‘lovers bench’ and talk the whole night off. I really talked about so many things she couldn’t believe she was telling me but she told me anyways. There’s a lot of opening up and all… that semester I had raised up the topic of going to pray with so many of my female friends, some denied, some just said, they can’t go with me, others, time factor. I asked Vida expecting the same response like the others and she agreed just like that. She didn’t know how we were going to do it but she agreed. I pray on my own almost every night on this field on campus most people go to pray on in the night and I just wanted to make another person prayer conscious, that’s all. After that first night that we TALKED, Vida confessed that she couldn’t believe that I actually came because of the message she sent…and that, it was sweet. Well I went to her place every night and called her to go and pray and up till now all those who know us know we still do. If you actually called around that time I won’t pick up…send a message.. the miraculous thing about us praying was that Vida had pray to God that He should send someone to her to help her get her prayer and spiritual life back on track so… ok ok time to sleep…

To be honest, I hadn’t really gotten over my ex-girlfriend when I asked her out, we both knew that but a strong woman she was, she gave us a chance after careful thought. Say it was the stupid thing to do but I found happiness and true love again and everyday I love her and would die everyday if I had to prove it. ohhh before I forgot we still take the walks and talks always!!!! Te quiero mucho!